


Washing What You Know out to Sea

by zubeneschamali



Series: Feel the Light Start to Tremble [2]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Space, M/M, Sequel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-22 14:26:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30040056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zubeneschamali/pseuds/zubeneschamali
Summary: What happens when the two of you spent what you thought was your last night on Earth (so to speak), confessed your feelings, but lived to see another day? What then?
Relationships: Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki
Series: Feel the Light Start to Tremble [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2209890
Comments: 9
Kudos: 92





	Washing What You Know out to Sea

**Author's Note:**

> Title is still from "If I Lose Myself" by One Republic. Sequel to [Feel the Light Start to Tremble](https://archiveofourown.org/series/2209890), written for smpc.

"Yesterday you said we could leave today." Jensen was aware he was sounding like a petulant child, but he really couldn't help it. He was so tired of being in this bed, especially since Jared had been up and walking around for three days already.

Jared gave him a warning look. "That's what the robo-nurse estimated. But your vital signs still aren't back to normal, especially your core temperature, and we're not leaving until they are."

"I'm fine," Jensen retorted. "I feel fine."

"Too bad. You're gonna have to wait a few more days to get me naked on the beach." Jared winked.

Jensen rolled his eyes, but he couldn't help the small smile turning up the corners of his mouth. "That is damn good motivation, I gotta say."

"Just rest, Jen." Jared took his hand in both of his, and Jensen could feel the warmth seeping into his skin from Jared's long fingers. "There's nowhere we have to be."

"How's the _Impala_?" 

"Same as when you asked yesterday. Repairs on the outside are almost done, and the heating system is just about returned to its normal state after what you had to do to it. They're still willing to reinforce the fuel tanks, though it'll take a few more days."

Jensen looked away. "Not sure I can afford it."

"I'm happy to pay a whole shit-ton of credits to keep anything like this from happening again, Jensen. I can take out a loan, I can ask my family—"

"You don't need to do that. I mean, I have savings. I just—was saving it."

Jared didn't reply. When Jensen finally looked at him, he was staring down at their clasped hands, a muscle in his jaw twitching. "I can't imagine anything more important than keeping our home intact," Jared said in a low voice.

A thrill of…something…went down Jensen's spine. "Our home, huh?"

Jared's gaze flicked up towards his, looking almost defiant. "Yeah."

Jensen nodded slowly. Jared had been his only crew member for three years, but it was hard to remember a time without him. And after what had happened as they shared body heat to avoid freezing to death, it was even more difficult to imagine a life without him. He said hesitantly, "I know we should talk about…what's next. And you know I'm not really that good at talking."

"One of your many charms," Jared said lightly.

He held Jared's hand more tightly, hoping his expression could say what his words couldn't. "Why don't you go put the order in to get the fuel tanks reinforced. Tell 'em to take it out of my account, same as the rest. I'll work on getting better so we can get out of here."

Jared searched his eyes, and Jensen drew on his courage and let him see the apprehension he was feeling, but also the willingness to go forward from here, whatever that might mean. After a moment, a small, soft smile crept across Jared's face, and he slowly leaned forward.

Jensen lifted his head from the pillow to meet him, lips pressing and parting in a too-brief kiss. He would have complained, but Jared was already standing up and letting go of his hand. "I'll get her fixed up, Jen. See you in a bit."

While Robinson Station was pretty bare bones, it did have an infirmary capable of thawing out two nearly-frozen spacers, plus a surprisingly good dry dock. Even so, it was going to take a week to add the reinforcing material to the _Impala_ 's fuel tanks so future fist-sized rocks wouldn't send all their propellant spewing out into space. And Jensen was damned if he was going to spend an entire week on this mind-numbingly dull station.

Fortunately, there was a free shuttle service from the dry dock to the planet below. Even better, it was a Class 1A planet, which meant no suits were required for the atmosphere _and_ the gravity was close enough to the standard used on ships and stations that their bodies wouldn't be affected.

"Have you been here to Hegu before?" Jared asked as the shuttle settled to the ground.

Jensen shook his head. "There's better places to spend your time off, and I don't get a lot of time off."

"Don't I know it," Jared said ruefully. He stood up and extended his hand to Jensen. "C'mon, let's go."

He let Jared tug him to his feet, and to his surprise, Jared didn't let go of his hand. The airlock opened onto a short jetbridge, and then they were descending stairs and walking through an open door into raw, unfiltered air.

Jared paused and took a couple of deep breaths, chest expanding and shoulders rising and falling. Jensen couldn’t look away. "Always feels good to breathe real air," Jared finally said with a happy sigh. 

"With all its particulates and contaminants," Jensen replied. He gestured around the spaceport. "You know how much half-burned fuel is floating around in the air here?"

"Shut up," Jared said cheerfully, pulling him forward.

Jared had made all the arrangements while Jensen was finally passing the robo-nurse's tests and getting himself checked out. Jensen trusted Jared's judgment—mostly—but he was a little alarmed to see him heading towards a rover rental counter. "We're driving? Isn't there a maglev or something?"

"It's a lot easier in only two dimensions. Believe me."

At least the road was paved, and Jared was indeed as competent at maneuvering a two-seater rover as he was a spaceship. The road wound through tall hills striped with orange and grey rock, dotted with the occasional scrubby green tree that looked like it was trying its damndest to grow despite the lack of actual soil. Jensen kind of liked it.

After about an hour, they rounded a curve and an expanse of sparkling turquoise water opened out in front of them. "Wow," they both breathed at once, then grinned at each other.

There was a cluster of hotels and cabins along the lakeshore, and Jared headed towards the largest, tallest hotel. "We get a special deal from the dry dock or something?" Jensen joked.

"My treat," Jared said as they pulled up to the front.

Jensen frowned as a valet came forward to take the rover keys. He'd never stayed in a place this fancy before. "Jared, are you—"

"Shut up," Jared said again, and Jensen let it go for now.

Their room was on one of the highest floors, overlooking the spectacular lake view. "It's a shame it's too alkaline to swim in," Jared said as he tossed his bag on the bed. 

"Then why are we here?" Jensen asked. "I mean, it's pretty, and it sure beats Robinson Station."

For answer, Jared pointed out the window, down at the foot of the hotel.

If Jensen squinted, he could see a patch of light brown sand about the size of the _Impala_. "Is that a beach?"

"Sort of." Jared wiggled his hand back and forth. "It's walled off from the water so you don't accidentally go in. It's the closest we can get to a beach in this system."

Jensen turned to face Jared, who was watching him hesitantly. After a moment, Jensen let a smile creep across his face. "I love it."

Jared beamed in reply. "Good. It'll do for now, at least."

It look longer to ride the elevator down and walk across the road than it did to cross the "beach." But Jared made them take their shoes off anyway to walk through the coarse sand. Jensen paused for a moment to dig his toes under the surface, taking in the strangeness of ground that shifted beneath his feet.

When he looked up, Jared was watching him. "What do you think?"

Jensen shook his head. "You know, normally I don't actually like Class 1 planets. I mean, it's great not to have to suit up, but all that open space really makes me nervous."

"I won't let the sky fall on you," Jared replied with a grin.

Jensen smiled softly at him, thinking about how Jared had tried to keep his spirits up when they were trapped in a slowly-freezing spaceship, keeping up enough hope for both of them that they would be found in time. "I know you won't. That's why I kinda like it here."

Jared ducked his head, his grin only growing. 

Dinner was in the hotel restaurant, a fish native to the alkaline lake that Jensen was dubious about but turned out to be okay. Jared was scarfing it down along with the local greens. "This is delicious," he said through a mouthful. He gestured with his fork at Jensen's plate. "You like it?"

"It's okay." Jensen poked at it a bit. "Guess they must wash it pretty well, given what it's usually swimming in." 

"It's basically pre-salted fish. Super easy to prepare." Jared popped the last bite in his mouth. "Not the usual energy cubes, huh?"

"Just because I like to know what's in my food and not that it was out there in the wild eating and absorbing from the atmosphere God knows what," Jensen replied good-naturedly as they fired up the "real or cubed" food argument for probably the twentieth time.

They kept it going until dessert arrived, and Jensen had to agree that the fruit mousse beat anything that came in a cube. Jared beamed when he admitted it, and the sunshine from that smile was enough to make losing the argument worth it.

It wasn't until they were back upstairs in their room that Jensen started to feel nervous. Jared had obviously made some assumptions when he made the travel arrangements, given that there was only the one room with only the one bed. But maybe that was all that had been available, or maybe it had been cheaper, or maybe—

"Hey." Jared stepped in front of him, concern and affection mingled on his face. "We never really got to talk, you know. If it was just a one-time thing, special circumstances of freezing to near-death and all, I get it."

It was tempting to ask if that's what it was for Jared, to force him to admit it first. But Jensen knew that was what this trip was: an attempt to show Jensen it hadn't just been the heat of the moment (so to speak), but that it could be a real shift in their relationship. So he lifted his chin and said, "You said you would have most regretted never kissing me. I said I would have most regretted not telling you how I felt. And I never did that, did I?"

"You don't have to." Jared shook his head. "I'm not—I don't want to pressure you or anything."

"I know." Jensen stepped closer, raising his hands to Jared's sides, watching his fingers curl around those narrow hips. "It's another one of those things I love about you." 

A tiny, hopeful smile curved the corners of Jared's mouth. "One of what things?"

"Oh, there's like, three total." Jensen waited until Jared pretended to glare at him before shooting him a smirk. Then he softened his expression and raised a hand to touch Jared's cheek. "There's a lot, actually. Sometimes I can't believe you've only been on the _Impala_ for three years. It seems like I've known you my whole life." He stroked Jared's cheek and then went on, voice huskier, "I think the day you answered my ad for a pilot was the best day of my life. I just wish it hadn't taken nearly dying for you to know that."

The hopeful smile turned slightly regretful, but then Jared was moving closer, tilting his head to the side, and Jensen leaned forward to meet him halfway.

Their first kiss had been sudden and surprising, but also shadowed by the dire situation they were in. Here, there was no threat or danger, nothing but the two of them getting to know each other in this whole new way. Jensen knew Jared so well: what he looked like after just waking up, how he preferred his coffee sugary-sweet, where every mole on his face and neck were, how he stayed cool and calm in the tensest of situations, how his aim with the _Impala_ 's weapons was dead-on accurate.

But Jensen hadn't known how Jared's lips felt against his, how his tongue would tease and test and dart until Jensen was grabbing Jared's head with both hands and holding him in place so Jensen could plunge his tongue inside the welcome heat of Jared's mouth. He hadn't known the surprised, almost helpless moan that Jared would let out, how he'd grind his hips into Jensen's while he let Jensen do what he wanted with his mouth. 

He'd learned, briefly, how Jared's hands felt on his skin, cold from the rapidly-falling temperature inside the _Impala_ but still strong and welcome. But he hadn't known what it was like to have Jared pull his shirt off and run those beautiful long fingers all over his chest and back. It chased away the slight chill Jensen seemed to feel every time he was unclothed these days with a delicious heat that had him breaking their kiss to tug Jared's shirt over his head as well.

And his own hands looked damn good on Jared's skin, running through the sparse hair on his chest, spanning the length of his broad shoulders, feeling the glorious muscles of his back that Jensen had seen all too few times when Jared was changing clothes or coming out of the shower. He needed more, though, needed to see his hands all over Jared, so he fumbled at the waist of Jared's cargo pants.

The tug at his belt told him Jared was doing the same, and he glanced up to share a small, secret smile with Jared. He felt his pants sliding down his legs, and he struggled for a moment to shuck off his shoes and pants. Jared was having less success, and he finally fell back onto the bed with an, "Oof!" 

Jensen knelt down to tug off Jared's shoes and pants. When he rose up again, hands tracing up the insides of Jared's mile-long bare legs, Jared was staring at him wide-eyed, reddened lips parted. 

_Oh._ Jensen suddenly remembered what Jared had said in their frantic make-out session, that he wanted to get on his knees for Jensen, and a bolt of arousal shot through him. He placed his hands on top of Jared's thighs, thumbs teasing along the insides of his legs, and leaned forward to place a kiss on Jared's taut stomach.

Jared fell back onto his elbows, still staring down at Jensen with wonder. Suddenly feeling powerful, Jensen let his teeth lightly scrape over Jared's skin until they reached the waistband of his underwear. Then he took a firm grip and pulled downward, angling his head until he maneuvered the briefs over Jared's growing erection, letting it spring free.

Jared drew in a sharp breath, but Jensen was already ducking his head, tongue coming out to taste for just a moment before his mouth closed around the tip of Jared's cock.

Jensen was glad he had his hands on Jared's thighs to hold him down, because Jared's hips immediately tried to buck upwards. Jensen pulled off long enough to give Jared a warning look, and then he set about trying to get as much of Jared into his mouth as he could.

It wasn't as much as he would have liked—there was a lot of Jared, after all. Given the noises Jared was making, that didn't seem to be a problem. Jensen shifted so his weight was on his forearms across the top of Jared's thighs, leaving his hands free to stroke the base of Jared's cock. He'd never smelled Jared's sweat so strongly, tinged with something deeper and muskier, and he loved it. Soon, Jensen was bobbing his head up and down, tongue swirling around as he went, hands caressing and stroking and squeezing as he listened to determine what was drawing the most moans and exhalations out of Jared.

There was a warning tug at his hair, and he pulled off, using both hands to stroke Jared ever faster and harder. Jared's eyes were closed, head thrown back, and Jensen watched in awe as his jaw dropped open as his hips arched forward, thighs tensing under Jensen's forearms.

When Jared came, it was with a bitten-off shout, almost as if he'd been hurt. He shot all over his lower torso and Jensen's hands, hips bucking a couple of times before he fell back onto the bed, head lolling to the side.

Jensen watched him for a moment, taking in the heaving of his chest, the twitching of his cock, the sweat glistening across his skin. He suddenly couldn't believe that he got to have this, and his own arousal was suddenly almost overwhelming.

He scrambled up onto the bed, kneeling over Jared, one hand already frantically jacking himself. The movement of the bed got Jared to open his eyes, and when he saw what Jensen was doing, his gaze darkened.

Jensen expected him to take over, but instead Jared put his hands behind his head and stretched out, settling back against the bed. His gaze roamed over Jensen, from the way his legs were braced on the bed to his hand frantically stripping his dick, up his chest and to his face. Jensen felt like he was gasping for air, mouth wide open and lips probably red from sucking on Jared's cock. Jared's pupils were still dilated, his eyes dark and wide, and the way he was looking at Jensen was almost like a physical touch. He wanted that so bad, wanted Jared's on him, touching and stroking and petting, wanted those long fingers inside of him, wanted—

Jensen didn't think he was that close, but suddenly he was coming, splashing onto Jared's chest, right over where Jared's come was starting to dry. He groaned as a second wave hit him, legs trembling with the force of it, pleasure washing over him from head to foot.

Then he was collapsing at Jared's side, curling up against warm skin as Jared put an arm around him and held his suddenly-sweaty body close as his breaths slowed to something like normal.

Jared was stroking down his back, slow and rhythmic. "Next time, I should get to help," he said in something like a pout.

"I mean, it's nice to know that I wore you out so much you couldn't even lift a finger," Jensen muttered into his shoulder.

"Shut up, I was enjoying the view," Jared retorted. He lifted Jensen's chin with two fingers and pressed a kiss to his mouth. Jensen returned it, still getting used to this new kind of exploration with someone he knew so well.

When they parted, Jared's eyes were twinkling. "I like that we can still insult each other, though. Like, nothing has changed."

Jensen stretched out so they could both feel how much bare skin was touching, from shoulders to intertwined legs. "Nope, nothing's changed at all."

"Only good things." Jared smiled at him fondly. "I'm really looking forward to making up with you after our fights now."

"We don't fight," Jensen said loftily. "You sometimes have incorrect ideas about the best way to do things, that's all."

Jared's eyes narrowed. "Is that all?"

Jensen drew breath to say more, but Jared was suddenly rolling him over and pressing him down into the beautifully soft mattress. "I hope this isn't an incorrect idea," Jared murmured as he held Jensen's arms over his head and settled his legs between Jensen's, their groins nestled against each other.

"No, no, this is a great idea," Jensen blurted out, and then Jared's mouth was descending on his and there wasn't anything else he needed to say.


End file.
